The last month has been tough for us. At the beginning of May we received some devastating news regarding my reproductive health. I've realized lately that I am way stronger than I ever thought. After I woke from my surgery and Roy broke the news, I spent two days boo hooing and feeling sorry for myself. Then a strange thing happened. I felt a calm come over me and a feeling that everything was going to be OK. Also I started realizing God's presence all around me. Songs coming on the radio at just the appropriate time, Tyler all of the sudden not asking for a sibling, little things that gave my peace and a stronger belief that everything truly would be OK. Everything else seemed to be getting better. We accepted the diagnosis, started looking at our options, even went on a budget to plan for expensive procedures. Then this week we got more bad news. A follow up ultrasound revealed the need for another surgery and a risk of losing more of our options. Unfortunately I have to wait until next week to talk to the doctor and get all the information. So I went into another bout of boo hooing and feeling sorry for myself, only to be brought out of my funk by a customer. A sweet lady that is always cheerful and chatty. She was diagnosed with lung cancer in November and has maintained her positive attitude through the whole process. She visited me on Wednesday. During our chat she told me she was finding out next week if her cancer was terminal or not. She has to wait a week to find out if she is going to die. How ironic that a woman would come in with a week of waiting and a positive attitude. If anything this whole experience has strengthened my religious beliefs and made me thankful for everything good in my life. I am truly blessed.
****Update***** Looks like surgery is going to happen. My tangerine size cyst is definitely making a comeback. Please keep us in your prayers. Also if you could squeeze in a prayer for me to lose 5lbs in the next week so I look FABULOUS in my birthday party dress it would be greatly appreciated. 30 here I come! Yikes!
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2 comments:
Oh Amy..ok first of all I love the pic of tyler on your back deck?...is that your backyard? ...that is awesome.
Ok next I am so sorry to hear of your sad "reproductive health news." I think I told you that my sister went through that for a number of years.
Hopefully things work out and a miracle happens. If not than what a magic outlook you now have on life from that sweet lady you talked to. Life is short and I think we are down and out to often.
Those moments you talked about like hearing a song at the right time etc...I call those tender mercies from God.-those moments of answers & peace when all else tells you to feel otherwise.
Wow..sorry I just RAMBLED. Anyhoo thanks for your insightful words & story.
Good luck with surgery & I know you will look AWESOME in your party dress! :)
Okay so I have to apologize first, because your tshirt still hasn't been mailed. I took the wrong size to the post office the other day, but realized it before I mailed it. Then my hubby was supposed to mail it the following day, and he completely spaced it. So... it will be mailed on Monday! Look for it next week, we'll do quick shipping :)
Sorry about everything you are going through right now, but I am excited about your post on my blog and your thoughts with adoption. Feel free to email me with any questions!! Give yourself time and space to process and grieve, you owe that to yourself. I will be praying for you! God does have a plan!
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